The Mirror of Truth: Becoming Whole – A Journey from Performance to Presence Part 2

“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.” — Psalm 139:23 (NIV)

We all have moments when the mask begins to crack.

Mine came quietly at first. A question from a spiritual director. A subtle tension in my body I could no longer ignore. A wave of exhaustion that no amount of sleep could fix. Then came the harder moments: anger I couldn’t explain, tears I didn’t understand, a sense that I had lost myself somewhere along the way.

Psalm 139 reminds us that God not only knows our actions—He knows our hearts. He sees what we’ve tried to hide, even from ourselves. And in His presence, the truth doesn’t shame us—it frees us.

That freedom began for me through spiritual direction, therapy, and quiet spaces with God where I could finally be honest. I started seeing that many of my strengths—like discipline, problem-solving, and leadership—had been forged in the fires of survival. As a child, I learned how to take care of others before I learned how to name my own needs. I became capable because I had to be. I became strong because weakness felt unsafe.

But healing began when I realized:You’re not loved because of what you do. You’re loved because of who you are—My son.

That truth unraveled me in the best way. The layers of identity I had built began to fall away. Not overnight, but over time. With help. With grace. With God.

This post is not just about me—it’s about you, too. Because maybe you’ve been handed a script that says “keep it all together,” or “stay strong,” or “don’t feel too much.” Maybe your strengths came from the same place mine did: wounds that never got tended.

But God sees past the performance and into the pain. He’s not asking you to fix it all—He’s inviting you to face it with Him.

So I want to gently ask:

What mirrors—people, moments, books, or prayers—have shown you a deeper truth about yourself?

What childhood messages still shape how you see yourself today?

How might God be inviting you into deeper healing?

You don’t have to figure it all out today. But maybe today, you can take one honest look in the mirror—and trust that what you find there is still loved, still chosen, still worth the journey.

Lord, You know me better than I know myself.You see the parts of me I’ve buried, ignored, or denied.Thank You for holding truth and grace together. Give me courage to face what’s beneath the surface,And faith to believe that even there—I am Yours. Amen.

Leave a comment or journal your response to the reflection questions. I’d love to hear how your journey is unfolding. What’s something true about you that God is revealing in this season?